CrapWeLike

So this is an actual product review on Amazon (found and commented on by one of Drew’s friends).

After trying the Keurig B60 coffee maker at a friends and raving about it, my dead husband surprised me with one just like it for Valentine’s Day. It has been 8-months and I am “in love” with with K-Cup machine…

Comments:

Henry S. Birdseye III says:
Did giving you the Keurig B60 coffee maker provide your husband with the closure he needed to return to the afterlife, or does his ghostly spirit still walk the earth, giving quality Keurig coffee makers to those he loved as a living person?

Jason Phillips says:
Just as one should never look a gift horse in the mouth, one should always beware of zombies bearing coffee makers. Even really fancy ones.

J Campbell says:
I’m still waiting for either Valentine’s or for my significant other to die so she can get me one. I can’t hurry up Valentine’s day, but let’s just say I’m working on the other…

Derek Giromini says:
I’d like to believe that after I die, I give my wife something. A giant life insurance payout isn’t enough. Now, a giant life insurance payout plus a Mazda RX-7? Priceless!

B. Detweiler says:
Dead people give me things all the time! Usually rings and gold teeth though. And I use the term ‘give’ loosely.

C. Renne says:
I think I would be quite surprised if my dead husband did anything at all! Although, it would be nice of him to make up for the whole “dying on me” thing with this token of reconciliation. Plus, it makes banging coffee.

Benjamin L Marvin says:
I suppose when your husband dies on Valentines Day, you still have to be “in love” with something. A coffeemaker seem appropriate. And being the only one in the house, a one-cup maker just seems so convenient!

abigvictory says:
You’re lucky to have such a loving dead husband. Mine kind of just sits there, naked, in his favorite chair.

Jessica Moninski says:
I’m glad that this reviewer was able to find love again after the death of her husband, even if with a coffee maker. After my husband passed away (freak mechanical bull accident; don’t ask), I found happiness and hours of consolation in my Magic Bullet. With the extended warrranty, I’m confident that we’ll have many years of bliss together.

Randal Cooper says:
I hope that after my untimely death at the hands of a roving mob, or perhaps a thresher, I’ll be thoughtful enough to give my wife a Keurig B60 Special Edition Gourmet Single-Cup Home-Brewing System. Her feigned despair and loneliness will only be enhanced by caffeination as she appears at the funeral in a revealing mid-thigh length black dress, surrounded by hopeful suitors offering their “condolences.”

R. Villella says:
Personally, I don’t find coffee that hard to make. I don’t understand why it would cost tons of money and go through several coffee pots before you find one that “works”. They all work, it’s your coffee making technique that is broken. But, I too know what it is like to lose a loved one, and on V-Day. Man, that sucks. Hold on to that coffee maker with all your might as it is an everlasting tie to your late husband.